[She turns around quickly, alarmed by the outburst, and wishing she could swallow the words back, now that they hang heavy in the air between them. There's a large part of her that doubts it will ever come back, that she'll never amount to more than the basics. Someone who could have been great, could have changed the world...Dissolving into nothing more than an embarrassment, a failure, left to lick her wounds and hide in the South Pole forever.
But underneath everything, she's just as terrified, maybe even more so, to find she'll learn, but she'll never be like before. She'll just be a shadow of her former potential, will always struggle a little. Will always have to work at it and will never again be effortless, natural. It will no longer be apart of her, it's a tool she has to grasp. She's afraid of waking up to the day she finds out that Amon has marked her, changed her forever in some invisible way beneath her skin that she'll never be able to dig out or find, will never be without.
She doesn't know how to explain it, or how to tell him her frustrations, or doesn't know how to say she can't let go. Just like she doesn't know how to tell him she appreciates his quiet, constant strength that's there whenever she needs it, steady like an earthbender should be. Or how she's grateful for Bolin's cheerful persona and arsenal of jokes that have her laughing until she's breathless, or soft, calming, logical Asami.
Korra has never excelled at anything but conflict, and she curls closer to the water, exhales a sigh]
Some improvement. I can't even hold the water together long enough to move it. I did the same thing two days ago.
[Yesterday, she couldn't even move the water at all. Maybe the connection is temporary, will wane if she can't master it immediately. No one has the answers, and Aang won't speak to her any more. Everything for the first time in a long time, feels bleak]
no subject
[She turns around quickly, alarmed by the outburst, and wishing she could swallow the words back, now that they hang heavy in the air between them. There's a large part of her that doubts it will ever come back, that she'll never amount to more than the basics. Someone who could have been great, could have changed the world...Dissolving into nothing more than an embarrassment, a failure, left to lick her wounds and hide in the South Pole forever.
But underneath everything, she's just as terrified, maybe even more so, to find she'll learn, but she'll never be like before. She'll just be a shadow of her former potential, will always struggle a little. Will always have to work at it and will never again be effortless, natural. It will no longer be apart of her, it's a tool she has to grasp. She's afraid of waking up to the day she finds out that Amon has marked her, changed her forever in some invisible way beneath her skin that she'll never be able to dig out or find, will never be without.
She doesn't know how to explain it, or how to tell him her frustrations, or doesn't know how to say she can't let go. Just like she doesn't know how to tell him she appreciates his quiet, constant strength that's there whenever she needs it, steady like an earthbender should be. Or how she's grateful for Bolin's cheerful persona and arsenal of jokes that have her laughing until she's breathless, or soft, calming, logical Asami.
Korra has never excelled at anything but conflict, and she curls closer to the water, exhales a sigh]
Some improvement. I can't even hold the water together long enough to move it. I did the same thing two days ago.
[Yesterday, she couldn't even move the water at all. Maybe the connection is temporary, will wane if she can't master it immediately. No one has the answers, and Aang won't speak to her any more. Everything for the first time in a long time, feels bleak]